So a while ago there was a the whole a “A next Metal Gear is” teaser and a whole load of faggots were like “OMG, GREEN POWER SYMBOL, IT’S FOR THE 360.” Those fags sure got told with the announcement of the iPhone game, Metal Gear Solid Touch. Sure, this was predicted, but not by as much who thought it was for the 360.

Now, on the Playstation forums I have made some comments how it’s “a crappy game” and I got tons of fanboys telling me how you can’t judge something before you play it. I would have to disagree with you guys there. I have been playing videogames for over 15 years now. I think I could judge a game based on how it looks. I am also a critic, meaning I see what is being offered. So this is what I saw:
A Metal Gear game, with no buttons, only a touch screen. I also know what the iPhone is capable of. So a game where you touch the screen to shoot, and pinch/unpinch to zoom in/out. Was I right? Yes! Kojima in a later interview stated that they took out the stealth out of Touch in order to give the game a quickplay experience. Brilliant, that means I can have a quickplay experience while I am at home, doing nothing. Is there ever going to be an immerse game for the iPhone?

So what do we have? We have a fucking rail shooter with a Metal Gear skin. Great, a game we’ve all played 100 times, with no innovation. I won’t even touch the game, it’s not even worth my time. There’s probably going to be a retelling of the events that happen in MGS4. About 3 hours of gameplay. You’re better off playing those “win an iPod” ads on the internet. At least they’re free and they even give you cookies. Hooray.

Back to the argument of me not being able to judge a game based on how it looks. That argument applies to books. Not games. He even mentioned look at this album cover (Beatles’s White Album) and said “if you would judge this CD, you would assume it’s crap.” No faggot. Games are supposed to “look good” That’s like me saying “a good song doesn’t have to sound good” or “a good book doesn’t have to have a good story.”

Instead of fucking arguing how I am wrong, why don’t you try and prove why you are right?

Hey Matt, what the fuck is wrong with you, two posts in a day? Are you insane.
Answer: Yes, it’s “Christmas” and I have absolutely nothing to do.

So on Christmas I got the ultimate gift, money. So now I want to spend it, but the whole fucking problem is I can’t fucking buy anything. All stores are closed today. On Boxing Day there are going to be thousands of fucktards who will try and hunt down that ultra bargain to save a few cents. There’s no fucking parking anywhere, lines at stores it’s so fucking terrible. So if I even want to buy a pack of batteries, I have to wait an hour to do so.

Christmas shopping is also really stupid. “Let’s find the perfect gift for my x.” Face it, you will never do so unless the person actually tells you what they want! Sure, your gift recipient will pretend they like it. But in reality they will never use it in their life. Watch your shit get regifted. All that time and soul you put in to getting that really expensive gift, and you only fucking get some cheap ass thing back? Sure, buy the person something. But don’t go out of your way and buy something ridiculous. Even if I got a new car for Christmas I would be like “great, what am I supposed to do with my old one.” I also would be forced to sell it because I can’t afford insurance at the shit. Sure I would make $10,000+ but I would rather just get $10,000 so I can get what makes me the happiest!

To all fags who say “me three” I have to say the following:
Fuck you.

Are you some creative fuck that is trying to make a shitty pun that millions of people made before? Or are you too stupid to know that “me too” is spelt TOO and not TWO.

And if you say “me four” or higher, then double fuck you.

So while trying to go to sleep last night all I heard was a MIDI track of “We Wish You A Merry Christmas” for a few hours. It seems my neighbours bought some decoration that loops that song. Like honestly man, what the fuck?! Are you really that fucking passionate about this shitty Holiday? Now I woke up a few hours ago and I’m a tired asshole. Thanks neighbours, I love your music. I hope you love mine.

Fuck people who over do decorations, they could take the money they wasted on them and shove it up their asses.