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I miss the days of old cell phones. You know, back in the day where you didn’t have a MP3 Player on it. It seems like I can’t go anywhere without hearing some douchebag listen to his favorite song on the phones shitty speakers. What’s worse is when the dude set the song as the ringtone, but doesn’t adjust the volume of the song or anything so it comes out as a distorted piece of crap. No thanks, I don’t want to hear Pokerface when I am at McDonalds buying a cheeseburger, so don’t play it. Want to know what my ringtone is? Vibrate + Office Ring, I don’t need to show off my personality in my ringtone.

While I am on the subject of shitty sound quality, if you are in a car, don’t put the music on full. Please, I am not in your car and I can even hear the distortion. If you get a better sound system, then MAYBE you can do it, but for now you can’t. Oh, and definately don’t do it when you are listening to the radio, because static sucks. I was at Futureshop one day and went to the speaker section. The speakers were all hook up the a radio, playing a staticy radio station. I thought to myself, they want to sell the speakers, wouldn’t they show them off by maybe giving something that has GOOD sound quality? I guess not, people still bought the speakers, just because they were cheap and on sale.

Another note about sound, why is it that everything is about the bass? I bought an MP3 player and it has a button I press and it increases the bass. A fucking dedicated button for that! Is bass really that important? I like to listen to my music the way it was recorded, not with some bass increasing shit that kills the treble part of the song. Maybe I am just listening to the wrong genre, but if the point of bass is to feel it then why the hell is it in earbuds. Earbuds can’t shake the floor, but a great subwoofer sure can.

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Today’s post comes straight from the parking lot, yes I am actually writing this post in my car. I noticed it’s becoming a growing issue that people are becoming lazy bastards and leaving their shopping carts in the parking lot. Now this pisses me off to no end, I drive around and look for a parking space and the last one is taken by a fucking empty shopping cart. Yes, some lazy bastard didn’t bother to return it and decided to leave it in the middle of no where. What a lazy fucking asshole, put the cart back into the proper place. It’s not hard to do. Now you can call me a lazy bastard for not getting out of my car to move the shopping cart that is in my way, but remember. I am not the fucking one that put it there. Leaving a cart in the parking lot not only wastes a parking space, but it also has a chance of hitting something like a car.

How can we fix this? By making ALL shopping carts take in 5 dollar bills instead of a quarter. People are less likely to leave the cart in the parking lot if it’s 5 bucks. But if they still leave it there then hooray, I’ve made 5 bucks.

PS: Tell your kids to stop playing in the parking lot.

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Ah indiefags. Our latest and most hip music is called indie. You know, short for independent. How can there be an “independent” sound? I can go out and make a metal album in my friends studio. The album was made independently but it’s not the same as indie music. What indie music is, it’s hipster music. People want to be different and not listen to bands that are “big” and signed under large record labels. Hipsters like to listen to stuff that’s uncool and what’s not the norm. Too bad indie music is so fucking popular that I hear it every fucking day.

Let’s look at Kaiser Chiefs, they are signed under MCA Music also known as the Universal Music Group. How does that make them indie?

So instead of being “indie” why don’t you give yourself a proper music genre, like pop-rock or NWOFES (New Wave Of Faggy Emo Shit.)

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You gotta love conspiracies. A bunch of bullshit spouted from a bunch of basement dwellers who claim the government is out to get them. Fuck, I’ve had enough of hearing “America knew about 9/11 before it happened.” This is how I see it, it doesn’t fucking matter if they knew about it or not because you can’t change the past. Just move on and instead of picking out holes of shit that happens why don’t you guys make a plan how to make the world better. One time during the summer I had a long talk about conspiracies, the person I was talking to also said that the moon landing was fake. Once again I ask why does it matter? Does man being on the moon change anything in your life? Then again if the moon landing was fake then maybe the Russians can be the first people on the moon. Let’s go Russia!

Here is my own conspiracy:

“Hobos are actually a cheap viral marketing campaign to prevent kids from being homeless. The money collected by the homeless gets sorted at the offices of Concerned Children of Canada and eventually gets evenly distributed amongst all the homeless. There is no such thing as actually being homeless, everyone who is homeless is a paid actor.”

You can’t disprove that, can you?

The point I am trying to make here is maybe the government is telling the truth, and if it was actually trying to hide something then YOU the conspiracy folk would be assassinated right now. Think about it.

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This one is long over due, I had the idea thought about in March but I haven’t had time to write it. Anyways there was an article in the news that that said “Dog Bites Are More Common In The Summer.” At first I thought well no shit, but then I thought about how much time and money went into this research. Below is an actual quote from this article.

“It’s not clear why children are more likely to suffer dog bite injuries in the summer, but it may be because children spend more time outdoors playing with dogs in warmer months, the researchers suggested. Or it may be that dogs are generally more irritable in hot weather.”

Not clear? Some fucking research you’ve done. I thought that the point of the study is to come to a conclusion. It’s obvious that it’s because kids are outside more often. As for the dogs being more irritable in the summer, put it this way: When it is hot as fuck outside, you don’t normally tolerate too much bullshit. When your kid keeps getting in the dogs face obviously the dog is going to react.

This news story inspired me to create a new section of my site. Behold Obvious Facts. http://showmeyourrage.com/obvious-facts