Everyone loves cheap furniture that is both stylish and practical. Ikea is the best place to go if you want something like this. But those fucking Swedes over at Ikea design more than furniture. They turned their whole store into a fucking maze. Say you go in and you want to buy a bookshelf, you enter the store, have to go up the escalator, and find what you are looking for. You then write down the order number of that bookshelf and you continue walking around the maze because you can’t come back the way you back in, no there’s no stairs just an up escalator. So you continue walking all the way to the end of the “display” area of Ikea and make it to the down escalator. There, you have to find the shelf where your product is, it’s not that hard usually. But when you do find it guess what? You have to take that bookshelf from the fucking shelf. Such a thing can be pretty hard if trying to do it yourself. So you go around and try to ask the staff for assistance. No, the fucking people working there are little blonde women who just stand there and look pretty. “I will get someone to help you.” God, how about the people who can’t lift heavy objects work in the display room and the people who can work in the inventory, NOT THE OTHER FUCKING WAY AROUND.

The reason for the maze and mass confusion of Ikea is for you to see EVERYTHING the store has. It’s great marketing really. It’s like strapping someone down to a chair Clockwork Orange style and forcing them to watch Vince Shlomi sell them extra absorbent towels. But sometimes I wonder what would happen to Ikea in event of a fire, do they even have fire exits or will people be forced to maneuver the maze in a record speed?