Okay, I’m kind of cheating here. I touched on piracy before about a year ago. But recently in some forum discussions I managed to get some points across and had some people disagree with me. Anyways, here are some of the points.

Record labels shouldn’t be allowed to keep re-releasing the same albums over and over again. This is why I download. To protest this.

So you bought a copy of the Beatles’ White Album on vinyl and now you want it on MP3? Well you do know you can rip it onto your computer. The reason the record label is “double dipping” these albums is because the vinyl copy doesn’t sell well anymore. Everyone wants it either on CD or MP3. Why the hell would the record label continue to sell it on an obsolete format?

Besides, no one is forcing you to buy it on MP3 if you already have it on vinyl. Just because you bought the old version of it doesn’t mean you have a “right” to the new copy. Do I have a right to a new Mustang just because I have one from 1995? Nope. Do I want one? Yes.

However, I do hear this argument being used by people who don’t even own the original album. What the fuck?

I’m just doing it to hear how the album sounds like.

Yeah, except there are perfectly legal ways to hear how the album sounds like. You can either listen to the singles on the radio or internet. You can listen to song samples on most online retailers. Or you even go to a record store and they will allow you to prelisten to the album before buying it. It’s quite nice.

Artists don’t get paid much for each album anyways.

While it might be true that royalties are a bit low, you have to understand that without a record label or a studio, the bands can’t make albums. Besides, if the album sells well, then the label will pay the band to release another album. If the album sales are low, then the label will drop the band. Recording an album isn’t cheap. It can end up costing quite a lot in the end. People aren’t going to work for free, and studio gear isn’t anywhere close to cheap.

I will probably end up revisiting this topic somewhere in the near future. But till then remember. The only reason you download things illegally is because you are too cheap to buy the actual song/album. Stop making up bullshit excuses.

“I wanna take a ride on your disco stick” – Love Game by Lady Gaga
Okay, I get it. It’s a penis. But there is no such thing as a “disco stick” nor is the song about a disco. Disco stick just sounds stupid, lyrics would work better if she just said “I’m a whore and I wanna take a ride on your dick!”

“I kissed a girl and I liked it” – I Kissed A Girl by Katy Perry
It’s funny because a lot of guys are probably getting off at the image of Katy Perry making out with a chick. Lesbians also probably blast this song in their cars. The funny thing here Katy Perry isn’t even a lesbian, so much your ultimate fantasies. Besides, the internet is full of lesbians, you can just watch that.

“I’m so 3008 you’re so two-thousand and late” Boom Boom Pow by Black Eyed Peas
While this whole song is filled with retarded lyrics, this one line shines brighter than the other shit. Fergie, you’re so 3008? Tell me how does it feel to be so hip? I would really like to know. Wait what’s this? I am two-thousand and late? I am not hip like you? Ah shucks, I really wanted to be cool like you. Just fix the date on your iPhone, it’s 2009, not 3008.

“Cause it’s nine in the afternoon” – Nine In The Afternoon by Panic At The Disco
Yes Panic At The Disco, it totally is nine in the afternoon and my eyes are the size of the moon. “Oh, I can’t rhyme with evening, so let’s change “nine in the evening to nine in the afternoon.”

“My flow so tight and the beat’s so sick, Chris Brown should get his ass kicked” – My Flow So Tight by Smoke Jumpers
What the fuck does Chris Brown have to do with your flow? Way to use pop culture references to get yourself famous for a bit. That’s all that song was, a one hit wonder and the only reason it was popular was because of the Chris Brown line. No one will understand that joke in a year, and no one will listen to the song.

“Tell your boyfriend if he says he’s got beef, that I’m a vegetarian and I ain’t fucking scared of him” – Don’t Trust Me by 3oh!3
Oh how fucking funny. Everybody laugh at the joke. Hahaha. However let’s take this seriously for a moment. Okay let’s not, it just sounds too stupid.

“Singing Sweet Home Alabama all summer long” – All Summer Long by Kid Rock
Alright, I already wrote about this a while back ago (pre comic SMYR era). But why the fuck would you include the name of the song you’re ripping off in the song itself?

“Uno, Dos, Tres, Catroce” – Vertigo by U2
Fuck you Bono, just because it’s not English it doesn’t mean that you can make up lyrics that don’t makes sense. (It means 1, 2, 3, 14 for anyone who doesn’t speak Spanish.)

“Hey hey hey I wanna be a rockstar” – Rock Star by Nickelback
Hey Chad, you already have all those things. What the fuck are you singing about? Oh right, you wanna be a ROCK star, not a fag with money.

“Blame it on the al al al alcohol” – Blame It (On The Alcohol) by Jamie Foxx
No, I’m gonna blame it on your shitty song writing.

“If I were a boy, I think I could understand” – If I Were A Boy by Beyonce
Straight from the asshole of feminism comes Beyonce and writes this song. All girls listen to the song and say “OMG IT’S SO TRUE.” No, Beyonce is just a whore who sleeps with the wrong guys. She then goes off and writes a sexist song how girls are superior to guys.

“If you can’t stand the way this place is, take yourself to higher places” –  Break by Three Days Grace
If you read this and don’t see what’s wrong with these lyrics have a listen to the song and see how incredibly redundant. Rhyming “placES” and “place IS” is just horrible writing.

From the realm of the past comes arguably the most popular band in the world, the Beatles. Today marks the release of Rock Band: The Beatles. A game developed entirely around the popularity of both the Rock Band series and The Beatles. One might think that this is a great idea, combine two popular franchises into one. The only problem is that these two different things appeal to much different demographics. The Beatles appeal to mostly people between the ages of 40-70 and Rock Band is popular with people 13-25. So the problem here is you have a videogame for old people. Yeah, that will really work out nicely. In an interview, the developers of The Beatles: Rock Band have stated “this game is aimed at an entirely new demographic,” so it’s not like the developers don’t know what they are doing. But will a 50 year old run out and buy a $199.99 Xbox 360 then go to spend 250 dollars for the complete box set of the game? Sounds like a large expense for someone who just wants to try it. It’s not like spending a dollar to try that ‘new’ Coke with Lime, you’re spending 450 dollars + taxes.

The Beatles are a great band aren’t they? It’s too bad I don’t like them. Now before you get all anal and say “you’re an idiot none of the bands you like today would exist without the Beatles.” Yeah fuck you, I don’t have to like them. Music evolved even further after The Beatles, I like this evolved form of music. The same statement can be said about Mozart or Ludwig Van, music you like wouldn’t exist without them. Yet I highly doubt any of you people listen to classical music on a regular basis. Me saying “I don’t like The Beatles” doesn’t translate to “The Beatles are shit.” It just means that I won’t purposely play a Beatles song on my computer. Does not liking the most popular band ever make me crazy? I don’t think so, it’s just that I don’t dig their sound. I listen to music I actually like. I don’t listen to songs because they were/are popular.

And seriously? If you claim to be a Beatles fan, name me 6 songs by them. No Wikipedia, no Google, no lyrics websites. If you successfully named 6, when was the last time you seen The Beatles in concert? Do you OWN all the albums? Are you willing to spend 250 dollars on The Beatles Rock Band? If you have completed all tasks then you are in fact a fan of The Beatles. Just because you list “The Beatles” on your list of favorite music on Facebook, it doesn’t make you a fan. It seems like hipsters and high school kids believe they are cool by listening to a band from the 1960s. Newsflash buddies, you are about 50 years too late to be cool by listening to them. You could be cool by listening to today’s pop music like Lady Gaga, and Jonas Brothers. What’s that? You want be to be different and listen to old songs on vinyl? You’re so fucking cool now.

Ah blink-182, truly a piece of shit band. Tom Delonge, Travis Barker, and that other guy. With hit songs like “What’s My Age Again?” and “First Date.” You can already tell that their songs are aimed at 10 year old elementary school kids. They recently had a concert here in Toronto, and surprise surprise it was sold out. All the 14 year old girls flocked to see Tom Delonge and the gang play shitty music.

I’ve had people on my Facebook and MSN saying “OMG TRAVIS BARKER IS SOOO HOT!!!!” so what the hell? Are people going there for the music, or just to stare at Travis Barker’s chest? This just proves my point that people no longer listen to music for the music and instead have a whole sexual attraction to the band.

Then you have people saying “TRAVIS BARKER IS THE BEST DRUMMER EVER.” Which right there is a bunch of bullshit, there are tons of better drummers than Travis Barker. One time Travis broke his arm, but in order to keep making money he stayed on tour. He then preceded to play his setlist one one hand. People call him a good drummer because he was able to play with one hand. Ha, I find it funny how his music is even possible to play with one hand. So Travis Barker can play Soulja Boy on drums? That just proves on how big of a faggot he really is. And if Travis Barker was REALLY good, how come he is wasting his talent with shitty punk-rock bands?

Normally, I would never even think about posting a blog post about a celebrity, but in this case I think it is acceptable because Susan Boyle certainly isn’t a celebrity. What Susan Boyle is some ugly bitch who appeared on a reality TV show and suddenly got too much fame than she deserved. If you haven’t heard about this, here is a brief summary. On “Britain’s Got Talent” there was some ugly ass woman that stepped up and said “she wanted to be a singer.” Simon Cowell (of American Idol) looks at this bitch like she’s the son of Satan, but then she starts singing and the audience cheers for her because her voice was actually good.

But what happened is that I’ve heard people say “she was an eye opener for the media, that you don’t have to look good to be a musician” Now, I agree with this, totally, but why the fuck do people just notice this now? Voice has nothing to do with how you look, you can look like a hairy asshole and have a voice of a god. The majority of the public lives is some fucking bubble which only seems to judge people based on their look. All the music they listen to the artist is “so sexy” and it seems to be all that matters. The funny thing is, most of this pop music is ONLY based on looks, the music sucks total ass.

Now I am not one of these people who say “looks don’t matter, it’s on the inside that matters”. Fuck that shit, looks are pretty important. But if you are a musician you don’t need to look good. However if you are a model, I expect you to look perfect.

Flash forward to today, Susan Boyle was crazy after getting 2nd place. She apparently destroyed her hotel room and ended up in a hospital. She also apparently is going to be touring USA sometime soon. I think people are over reacting to this shit. Susan was never an amazing singer, she was decent. This blog post isn’t to insult her, but rather the people who think she’s such a change from the sexy singers of pop music. Rage.

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As I mentioned in the previous post, I hate hearing Poker Face while at McDonalds. I hate hearing Poker Face period. What Lady Gaga is, it’s a stuttering idiot who looks as stupid as she sounds. I have no problem with repetition in music, I enjoy the song Around The World by Daft Punk as a matter of fact. But  stuttering is just stupid. Just because you can’t sing doesn’t mean you shouldn’t speak English either. However this song is still insanely popular, and for what reason? For the shuttering?

Now, I also had the opportunity to watch the music video for this song. I have never laughed so hard in my life. First of all, that haircut is just fucking stupid. It looks like it was done by an 8 year old. Secondly, the video even seems to have a stuttering problem. Next, the dance that Lady Gaga and her dancers do just looks retarded. If you disagree with any of that, watch the video, near the end she does something where she covers her face. I could watch that for hours, and I think I will. Enjoy.
http://showmeyourrage.com/files/ladygaga.gif (2.4MB animated GIF)

PS: What the fuck is a disco stick?

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I miss the days of old cell phones. You know, back in the day where you didn’t have a MP3 Player on it. It seems like I can’t go anywhere without hearing some douchebag listen to his favorite song on the phones shitty speakers. What’s worse is when the dude set the song as the ringtone, but doesn’t adjust the volume of the song or anything so it comes out as a distorted piece of crap. No thanks, I don’t want to hear Pokerface when I am at McDonalds buying a cheeseburger, so don’t play it. Want to know what my ringtone is? Vibrate + Office Ring, I don’t need to show off my personality in my ringtone.

While I am on the subject of shitty sound quality, if you are in a car, don’t put the music on full. Please, I am not in your car and I can even hear the distortion. If you get a better sound system, then MAYBE you can do it, but for now you can’t. Oh, and definately don’t do it when you are listening to the radio, because static sucks. I was at Futureshop one day and went to the speaker section. The speakers were all hook up the a radio, playing a staticy radio station. I thought to myself, they want to sell the speakers, wouldn’t they show them off by maybe giving something that has GOOD sound quality? I guess not, people still bought the speakers, just because they were cheap and on sale.

Another note about sound, why is it that everything is about the bass? I bought an MP3 player and it has a button I press and it increases the bass. A fucking dedicated button for that! Is bass really that important? I like to listen to my music the way it was recorded, not with some bass increasing shit that kills the treble part of the song. Maybe I am just listening to the wrong genre, but if the point of bass is to feel it then why the hell is it in earbuds. Earbuds can’t shake the floor, but a great subwoofer sure can.

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Ah indiefags. Our latest and most hip music is called indie. You know, short for independent. How can there be an “independent” sound? I can go out and make a metal album in my friends studio. The album was made independently but it’s not the same as indie music. What indie music is, it’s hipster music. People want to be different and not listen to bands that are “big” and signed under large record labels. Hipsters like to listen to stuff that’s uncool and what’s not the norm. Too bad indie music is so fucking popular that I hear it every fucking day.

Let’s look at Kaiser Chiefs, they are signed under MCA Music also known as the Universal Music Group. How does that make them indie?

So instead of being “indie” why don’t you give yourself a proper music genre, like pop-rock or NWOFES (New Wave Of Faggy Emo Shit.)

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Oh music, how much time I waste listening to it. Hours of listening, and hours of analyzing. I have come to several items that is killing music.

First is piracy, people downloading songs is totally destroying sales. People no longer buy CDs and instead just download songs. People hear a song on the radio and instead of supporting the artist and buying the CD they fucking download the song. A common argument against this is “I don’t want to pay for a whole CD when I just want one song.” Well there is your fucking problem, listen to the full album, you will probably enjoy it if you like the band. That logic is fucked beyond belief. I can say I can’t afford a Ferrari, but that doesn’t give me the right to go ahead and steal one. Because of piracy, the record labels increase the cost of the CD, which actually makes less people buy it. It’s a stupid strategy but the label has to pay the band somehow.

Even legal downloading is killing music a bit. Artwork is no longer needed, people wouldn’t just sit around and look at a picture in their fucking iTunes but they would look at the CD when they put it in their CD player or whatever. Concept albums wouldn’t work online, it’s like listening to one Pink Floyd song from The Wall and not listen to the entire thing, it’s fucking pointless. Song running orders also don’t work, forget the songs that flow into each other. You are just going to listen to what you like, instead of being exposed to new music.

Next problem is the radio. Yes, the source of the problem is the place music comes from. The main problem with the radio is that it plays stuff that people WANT to hear, otherwise it would have no profit. But playing stuff that people WANT to hear limits the variety of stuff that people DO hear. Sometimes when I actually do listen to the radio, I hear the same song twice, about 20 minutes apart. Large variety of music my ass. All that plays is the same shit over and over again. I used to listen to The Edge 102.1 live at clubs. Then I noticed they play the exact same songs on those nights, except in different order. That is essentially what the radio is, a random playlist of songs that you already heard. If you are like me, you don’t even like pop, and you wish that you heard some metal on the radio.

The next point is singles, in order to make money bands have to release a song that people will be exposed to and be played on the radio. This is known as a single and most of the time it is the most generic song on the album. Now singles are good to introduce someone to a band but chances are that the single sounds totally different than the rest of the album (unless it is Dragonforce.) Bands, also sometimes concentrate too much time and energy into making a single instead of making the rest of the album good. Once again this is because of piracy, if a band can make you love one of their songs, then maybe you will actually BUY their album.

Next is people being worried about their popularity, these people are known as hipsters. They are worried about their musical taste being made fun of so they listen to whatever is popular. Therefore the bands that are already on the top 40 become even more popular while bands that are unpopular become ignored. Some of the bands I like actually skip Toronto, and the general area due to a lack of popularity.  While they sell out shows in Europe. The problem is not the band sucking, it’s Europe’s open mind about music.

The last thing is people being genre fags. As soon as something is a different genre than what people are used to, they dismiss it. I love metal, but I have to admit that there are good rap, techno, or even pop songs. I find that metalheads complain about genres a lot. “Oh, I don’t like Metallica’s new album because it is not brutal enough.” Fuck, just because Metallica doesn’t sing about Satan and use excessive distortion doesn’t mean it’s not a good album. I guess if you want the same shit over and over again you should listen to Dragonforce.

And that, is my 70th blog post. Enjoy.