Being a bastard who listens to music a shit ton, I would classify myself as knowing a lot about music. I hate a lot of genres and the list of stuff I like is actually quite limited. So why the fuck do people say “I listen to everything.” I will just say it right here, no you fucking don’t. Below are some genres you probably never heard of
Power Metal
Symphonic Metal
Speed Metal
J-Pop
Progressive
Jazz Fusion
Neo-classical
Celtic
Alternative Folk Rock
Baroque
…etc

I could go on for hours. But listening random music genres did not make me this way. Most commonly, when I hear people say “I listen to everything” they mean everything on the radio, because they don’t know that any other music exists. Singles, and hit music is created for the majority of the public to like it. It follows a simple formula which is repeated throughout most of the songs out there. So when you say you enjoy the song on the top40 I have to say NO SHIT, YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO LIKE IT.

What’s even worse is when people say “I listen to everything, except country.” Bullshit, you listen to Nickleback. Now fuck off.

Fuck bros, bros are for fags. I am tired of listening to your shitty music “oh it’s all about the beat man.” Oh? So how about a melody, rythm or some fucking lyrics?

I have told many people this already. Techno music rips off other techno music, and you’re too stupid to tell. This all started when at work I heard a shitty version of Sandstorm by Darude (I actually like this song, not being a total music basher here.) Hearing this version reminded me that “DJs” like to fuck up songs that other “DJs” ripped off from another “DJ”

Example: Basshunter’s English Dub of DOTA: All I Ever Wanted
Here we have a shitty remix by “DJ Skyslash” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zCjz3_FeZY
The “original” Basshunter version: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ma2ZhVHqccA
And the ORIGINAL song by Daddy DJ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CyH-2amZlWY

Gee, it all fucking sounds alike doesn’t it? So why the hell are 3 people getting fame for one guy’s work? Fuck bros.

So Chad Kroeger, the singer of Nickelback recently stated that he is disappointed at “the lack of good rock bands.” Great job Chad. You have successfully pointed out whats wrong with your music. You see, there is not a lack of good rock bands. It’s just you won’t find good rock bands by fucking listening to MuchMusic. Hell, I have a more diverse song list by listening to my music collection. Maybe if Nickelback was a better band this statement would be a little stronger. But for now he could go fuck right off.

He then later went on to say “kids need to learn to put down the Guitar Hero and learn a real instrument.” Good point, except for the fact that Guitar Hero is not old enough to have corrupted music yet. And besides, it surely didn’t help Chad.

I heard it all the time, cries of how bands “sold out” or “gone commercial.” It is mostly taken out of context. A band release a CD you don’t like and you, with a limited musical vocabulary have to use phrases like “sold out.”

Example, on Youtube for the new Edguy song ‘Ministry of Saints’ (haven’t heard of them? Thought so) there are several comments on how Tobias (singer) went commercial with the songs. Gone commercial? You will never hear this on the radio (at least in North America) with Europe you have a chance, but it is slim. Either way, it will never make the top 40 countdown or whatever.

It’s a shame really, there’s so much unheard music out there and some of it is pretty good. Most people rely on “hit songs” in order to expand their library. Now, apparently once the artist that releases a “hit song” comes out with a new one that’s not a hit, the audience claims he sold out. Ohh how wonderful. A perfect example of this would be Metallica, having already been a popular band, fans of the old shit claim them to have sold out.

Now is selling out really that bad anyways? This is not punk music, music these days isn’t usually about boycotting the company or government. If a band signs to a large record label it shouldn’t be considered a bad thing, though to some it is. Listen, as long as the band continues to produce kick ass music I will still follow them. I do not have any objection to a band making MORE MONEY for them to have BETTER RECORDING, and have BETTER MANAGEMENT, so they could have BETTER TOURS, and CHEAPER PRICES on their CDs.

If the band takes a new direction after signing a contract, and you don’t like it anymore, though luck. If the band truly went a step in the wrong direction it will see it’s mistake and correct it. If they don’t correct it and are selling millions of CDs, then they are CLEARLY doing something right. Don’t blame them for your musical tastes.

In short, selling out is not bad, unless you are a hipster fuck and believe commercialism is evil. If a band “sold out” but can still produce kick ass music that I enjoy I will continue to support them.

Ever since my friend decided to get a record player I have seen countless really bad album covers. Now I know graphic design wasn’t so easy then as it is now, but if you can’t have a graphic designer, an artist should be sufficient. No?

Enter the world of vinyls, where you have the best and the worst album art ever created. Browsing thrift stores for cheap records we have came across a lot of art. The first one I am going to criticize is an album called “You Don’t Have To Be Jewish”

The title alone is a joke, that added with the photograph attached to it makes even Chad Kroeger not wanting to look at it.

Now we have an album that I do not know the name of due to a language barrier. There are two pictures of it however

I haven’t seen such a rad looking Muslim since I watched “Tunak Tunak Tun“

Stinkers aside, some have been really good. Recently I have gotten into an artist called Roger Dean. He was the guy who created most of the “Yes” covers. If you could remember all the way back to the 70s , you could remember how awesome they looked.

Seeing something like that can be a shining beacon of hope. Not only is it a beautiful album cover, but it’s Asia. Steve Howe will definitely amaze you with his crazy guitar playing skills. If you enjoy that Asia cover you should definitely check out Roger Dean’s other work.

Fast forward to today, and you do not have so many terrible album covers. Sure, some are really cheesy, but nothing really horrible. A quick Google search of “Worst Album Covers” will probably give you some musicians you have never heard of. Either way, most of these albums are 80s or before and are vinyls. However, with that you also don’t have anything that amazing. With the age of digital downloads, album art is virtually non-important. Marketing the album is no longer about making it look good, but rather making the band look appealing or making the music mainstream.

With today’s music scene, if it isn’t about losing your girl, your life sucking, or how much shit you can afford then you won’t hear of it. Example: Swedish Basshunter vs English Basshunter.

I could go on ranting about music forever, but I guess I will keep it there.
Too Long Did Not Read: Album art used to vary in amazing and terrible, now it’s all mediocre.