2010 is among us, we can no longer wear cool glasses with the two zeros as the eyes. (Unless in 2010 you put a one at the nose and use the other two zeros as the eyes, hmm)

Anyways, it’s been a while since I posted about a movie. Dark Knight was the last one, I complained about it because of Heath Ledger, remember? Well it’s happening again: A movie is becoming insanely popular for no reason at all. The movie I am referring to is obviously Avatar. James Cameron is at it again, he did it with Titanic; make over a billion dollars on a movie. Now I can’t really compare it to Titanic because I never watched it. But all I can say is Avatar sucked.

The story began in a future far, far away. It was some planet with some blue fuckers that live like the natives used to (haha, spoiler.) The movie was basically a microcosm of the real world. The earth people found a mineral on this planet that is fucking valuable. Naturally they can’t just take it so they have to start a war to get it. So it goes into a whole battle of stealing land (like the white people did to the natives) and grabbing some minerals (Iraq war). At first the army tries to take the land peacefully, by sending “Avatars” in to communicate with the natives.

Jake (the main character) was a crippled dude. When he first got to pilot one of these Avatars and suddenly he can walk again. Hallelujah. He was excited, jumping around and not having a care in the world. This made it very suprising when Jake chose to be an Avatar forever instead of being a human. But that’s a spoiler isn’t it? Anyways, Jake meets this one blue bitch and fucks her. He falls in love and no longer wants to help out the army trying to get rid of the natives. The army then destroys their fucking central tree hub and that’s when the movie gets fucking interesting. (This is 2 hours into the movie). Jake then gathers all the natives and fights the army. They win. Liberation at last, one problem. Jake didn’t want to be human anymore. The natives then do some crazy ass ritual to put his soul from his human body into the Avatar. It works. Moral of the story: Native technology fucking works.

There is a huge part of the movie where it attempts to build character. You are supposed to feel sorry for the natives when they got their home nuked. I however didn’t care. The only characters they build on was Jake and his bitch. Then they also showed how wonderful the world was. Full of colours and lights that every stoner would fucking enjoy. Infact, I bet you 90% of the audience was high when I went to go see it. I could hear the people behind me saying “oh man, it’s so trippy. Oh fuck man. Oh. OH SHIT” And all I say to that is, SHUT THE FUCK UP. Anyways, the world did look good, but it wasn’t anything that a Final Fantasy game didn’t already have. That’s actually what the movie would be better as. A game. Because the whole point of the movie was to show a wonderful world. You can’t get the same sense of exploration in a movie as you can with a game.

The majority of people I know went to see the movie “to see the effects.” To be fair, they were pretty good, but they could have been better. The movie basically separates the characters from the background and has the characters in a different “layer” if you will. This means that the characters appear to be standing out, and it looks pretty cool. But there are some points of the movie where they repeat an effect way too much. There was this one effect where it showed this drawer like effect. Where the camera was inside the drawer and someone pushed it in. Basically it looks as this thing is coming towards you. They used that effect about 3 times in the movie. Then later at the end of the movie it shows a bunch of flying bird things throwing helicopters. I swear they use reused the same animation 4 times at different angles.

To be fair, it was a decent movie. But it in no way deserves all this attention it’s getting. The 3D is decent, not great. (Apperantly they didn’t even use a high enough framerate). The story was predictable, and had many cliche elements.

On a side note, why the fuck is Heath Ledger in movies again? DAMN DEAD GUY!