Fuck Oprah. Fuck her and her millions of fans. I was going through the richest people list a while back ago and I saw Oprah there. I was like why the fuck is she so fucking popular. Then I heard people saying “Oprah is the housewives best friend.” So I understood everything suddenly. Oprah is some talk show host which poisons parents minds with paranoia and feminist theories. Let me start.

I’ve only ever watched one episode of Oprah in my life, this was the famous one about the child molesters and over 9,000 penises raping children. It had to deal with how child pornography spreads on the internet and how often it happens. Oprah then scares a bunch of parents into believing that their child is going to be raped so then the parents become over protective and watch their child like a hawk. Fuck, you’re child is probably not going to get raped. Your child has a larger chance of getting run over by a car than raped. Besides, most of the time child pornography comes from the parent of the child anyways.

Next I read that Oprah started some all girls school in South Africa. To apparently give girls an opportunity to make a difference in the world. Fuck you Oprah, guys can make a difference too, why exclude them? Oprah then later went on to say that she was inspired to build this school because of her “disadvantaged background.” Yeah Oprah, being a billionaire is really a disadvantage.  I guess getting raped at the age of 9 and getting pregnant at 14 really sucks. However the getting pregnant was your fault. Your life was bad like the African’s life.

Oprah is a media whore, nothing more. She sells her thoughts as facts, and wives go crazy over her every word. So do what Oprah did; stick over 9,000 penises into your ass.